Decluttering December 10, 2008

In my family room sits a very special box. Today it holds my table linens and serves as a make-shift end table. As a child, however, it was my toy chest. Some may find it difficult to appreciate the value of such a simple box. It’s not made of expensive hardwood. The wood stain has worn off in several places. Scratches are abundant. But I love my toy chest because it was made by my Grandpa and I’m reminded of my childhood when I look at it.

The toy chest was like a best friend coming to the rescue. It always provided a quick solution to a messy room. Simply open it up and throw all the toys inside! It usually worked, but sometimes I couldn’t close the lid. So I would bounce up and down on the cover, in hopes that my toys would shift around and fit inside the box.

As an adult, I have exchanged my toys for thoughts and my mind has become my toy chest. The past two months have been filled with learning opportunities and life experiences that evoked numerous thoughts, ideas, and emotions. Each of which deserved careful evaluation. Unfortunately, the rapid succession of the events didn’t allow time for sufficient processing which encouraged me to resort back to my childhood tactics. I simply stuffed it all into my head.

Tucking things away is a good temporary solution. But eventually it becomes necessary to set aside some time to organize. If you don’t, the clutter becomes so great that you forget what you have. And even the greatest treasure loses its value if it’s forgotten. My mind is so full that I am in danger of losing valuable concepts. It’s time for me to organize the “toy chest” of my mind.

Organizing is a fairly easy process with toys. I’m not sure it’s as easy with thoughts, though. Is it possible to empty your mind and throw all your ideas onto the floor? Are a couple hours truly sufficient to complete the task? Like a child before a pile of toys, I’m not even sure where to begin. I need help.

Many organizational coaches break large jobs into bite size pieces as to not overwhelm. Maybe God will coach me by taking my hand and saying, “Here’s the thought we are going to deal with today.” And overtime, together, we will categorize each thought. Thoughts that produce anxiety, anger, or unnecessary negative emotions will be put in the throw away pile. Thoughts that do not line up with God’s way of thinking and do not please Him are garbage. I will need to discard them. Some thoughts will need to be put in the give away pile. I have played with them long enough. I know them thoroughly and now it’s time for me to share them with others. And then there are those thoughts that I will put in the keep pile. They will be beneficial for the days ahead. So I will need to carefully organize them for easy retrieval in the future.

Sometimes I’m tempted to avoid the hard work. My justification would be that everything looks good from the outside. But my heart always wins out and the truth is I want to please my Heavenly Dad. When He looks on the inside, when He opens the lid, I want Him to find a mind that is clean.

Test me, O Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; for your love is ever before me, and I desire to walk continually in your truth (Psalm 26:2).

I Promise I’ll Be Back! November 24, 2008

I’m having one of those seasons where I am having to choose the best out of all the good. Responsibilities and realities of life have decided to fill the balloon of time to its maximum capacity. Thank you for continuing to check in. Love to all.

Push “Pause” Please! October 23, 2008

In my spiritual journey, there have been moments I wanted to freeze frame and live within the pause. The picture was beautiful. And for that brief moment all felt right. God’s presence settled like the warmth of a down comforter on a brisk autumn morning. I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want to blink. I barely inhaled hoping my slowed breath would stall the passing of the moment. It was a precious time…a rare time…a highlight in the midst of routine.

When we have the privilege of experiencing the glory, power and overflowing love of Christ in such a tangible way, it is so tempting to rip the remote control out of God’s hand and push the “pause” button. We know as the story of our lives continues, it won’t always feel this wonderful and our hearts long to revel in this gift. Like Peter on the Mount of Transfiguration, we try to reason with God and say, It is good for us to be here. Let’s build some shelters and stay. Let’s live here. It’s safe. It’s secure. It’s exciting. It pleases me. (Mark 9)

But we know better. Something in us hesitantly cries out, identifying the selfishness in that kind of thinking. We know we can’t live on the mountaintops. God has called us to the valley of reality because that is where His lost children are.

God understands what He is calling us to do is difficult. Jesus, Himself, came down from the ultimate mountaintop of heaven to live with us. He’s familiar with the challenges we face in the valley of reality: the difficult relationships, demanding jobs, daunting responsibilities, mind-numbingly dull routine, complex problems, and heartaches. Yet He asks us to sacrifice, as He did. He calls us to come off the mountain and to seek and to save the lost (Luke 19:10). He wants to use us to lead them to the mountain that they don’t even know exists.

It’s time to give the remote back so God can push the “play” button of your life. Thoroughly enjoy the highlights in your spiritual journey. Christ orchestrated them for you. He’s the one who took you by the hand and led you up the mountain. He met you there. He overwhelmed you with His presence. He filled you up. But when the time on the mountain has ended, take a deep breath, say a prayer of thanks, and walk back down into your mission field knowing Christ is always with you, holding your hand.

Ideas to Cultivate Contentment October 20, 2008

This weekend I had the privilege of speaking about contentment at Camp Pinnacle’s Women’s Retreat. We had a blessed time and today I continue to be in awe of what God did. I promised the women I would post some of my ideas for how to cultivate contentment through exercises that prompts gratitude. We learned that as our gratitude increases, our contentment increases.

So here’s my challenge…choose one idea and commit to trying it for six weeks. Remember contentment is learned. It requires diligent practice. But the more you work at it, the more natural it becomes.

Gratitude Partner Walk – Take turns sharing something you are grateful for every block. If it takes 30 seconds that’s okay. If it takes the whole block time that’s okay. At each new block change who is sharing. If you don’t have blocks, simply chose an amount of time.

Sweet Thoughts – Enjoy the sweet flavor of your favorite hard candy as you thank God or all the sweet blessings in your life. Continue until the candy is gone. No chewing!

Shopping Fast – Abstain from all shopping (except necessities) for one week.

Rubber Band Snap – Wear a rubber band for 3 days and every time you have a discontented thought, snap the rubber band as a reminder to avoid that kind of thinking.

Gratitude Scrapbook – Create a scrapbook filled with the things you love.

Gratitude Garden – Every time you work the garden, think about and pray for people in your life that are grateful for. When the harvest comes in, give a gift (a bouquet of flowers, vegetable soup or zucchini bread) to those people with a note of why you are grateful for them.

Watch It’s A Wonderful Life

Memorize Scripture - Choose a verse from our Truths for Contentment and memorize it.

Daily Gratitude Journal – Once a day record 5 things you were grateful for. If you are a morning person, do it in the morning by reviewing the previous day. If you are a night person, do it before you go to bed.

Negativity Log – For one week, when you have a negative thought, record the time and place. At the end of the week, review your log and look for patterns. Is there a time of day you are more susceptible to negative thinking? Is there a place? Place scripture cards in those places or meditate on scripture at that time.

Pre-mirror Talk – Before you look in the mirror, remind yourself that you are beautiful in God’s eyes and that He loves you. You are designed by Him for a specific purpose. Rejoice.

Gratitude Jar – Every time you praise God for a wonderful blessing, put a marble into the jar. See how long it takes to fill.

Thanksgiving Kernels – Place 2-3 corn kernels on everyone’s place setting. Before you have Thanksgiving Dinner, go around the table and for every kernel each person shares one thing they are grateful for this year.

Christmas Give Back – Take 10 percent of the money you would have spent on a person’s gift and give it to them in cash with a challenge to spend it on another person less fortunate.

Investments that Count October 11, 2008

Every time I open my computer lately, I am confronted with pictures of people in anguish. Usually it is a picture of a stockbroker clutching his forehead as he reads the falling numbers. The gym is filled with speculative conversations. I’ve had several friends ask my opinion about investing in gold or silver. The state of the economy has everyone reaching for a Tylenol.

I hate that people like my parents, who have worked hard their whole lives, are facing an unknown future. I don’t like watching our hard-earned money disappear. A total economic collapse would be devastating, but it does not compare to the collapse of a soul. That is a true tragedy. A temporary loss in our financial portfolio, even a complete loss, is not even on the same playing field as the loss of a soul for eternity. But has that truth penetrated my heart so that it affects my daily existence? I wonder when I last clutched my forehead as I anguished in prayer for someone who doesn’t know Christ.  I wonder if I’ve spent as much time talking about the hope of eternity as I have the doom on Wall Street. I wonder if I have evaluated how I am investing in the Kingdom as much as I have evaluated my financial investments.

Much energy is being dedicated to our economic troubles, as it should be. Yet even if we solved all our money issues tomorrow and we began to thrive again financially…even if we gained the whole world, what good would it be if we forfeited souls? (Matthew 16:26). Imagine if we lived and breathed the reality that people without Christ are going to hell. How passionate would be become?

Charles Spurgeon said, “If sinners will be damned at least let them leap to hell over our bodies. And if they will perish, let them perish with our arms around their knees imploring them to stay. If hell must be filled, at least let it be filled in the teeth of our exertions.  And let no one go there unwarned or unprayed for.”

Opportunity awaits.

On the Run October 2, 2008

Wandering is a natural part of our human nature. We struggle with keeping in step with the Spirit (Galatians 5:25).

This week I took Buddy, our Australian Shepherd for a walk. Most of the time, he was very obedient and stayed right by my side. Every once in a while, however, I sensed his desire to break free and run. I smiled as I thought about the similarities between my rambunctious canine and myself.

I adore my Master and I know He loves me. My days are spent in His presence. I try to anticipate where He is going so I can be a part of His movement. He provides for my every need. He is my Shelter, my Bread of Life, and my Living Water. He is my Frontline Plus as He protects me from pesky enemies. I know that the safest and best place is at my Master’s feet, yet I still get itchy and I long to run. I want to explore the possibilities around me. I wonder if I am missing something out there in the world.

At any point, I can choose to bolt and try to make it on my own. I can drink from dirty puddles and scrounge food from dumpsters. I can sleep on the damp ground. I can dodge the dangers on the road of life. But eventually exhaustion would bring me to my senses and I would realize I exchanged a brilliant diamond for a cubic zirconia.

Running wild is never as glamorous as we dreamt it would be. The temporary excitement quickly fades with the harsh realities of this cold world. And we come to appreciate the beauty of our Master’s leash. He uses it to protect us because He wants the best for us. He enjoys having us by His side. He loves our company. A dog is man’s best friend and we are God’s best friend. But He will not force you to comply.

There was a young man who wanted to explore the world outside of his father’s four walls. So “he set off for a distant country.” While he was there, he lived it up and “squandered his wealth in wild living.” Life became hard. He lived with pigs. He was so hungry he would have willingly eaten their slop, “but no one gave him anything.” Finally “he came to his senses” and went back to his father’s home. When he arrived, he repented. He admitted he was foolish. His father embraced him, gladly forgave him, and threw a party to welcome him home. (Parable of the Lost Son found in Luke 15:11-32).

Where are you today? Are you tugging on the leash? Are you out running? What are you searching for? Maybe it’s time to come home.

Slow Down… September 17, 2008

Much of our lives are lived on automatic pilot. We establish routines in order to effectively manage our days. That’s wise. But I have noticed that in the midst of normal, life’s important details are often overlooked.

We put on our earphones, take our daily run, and miss the beautiful morning songs of the cheerful birds. We jump in our cars, talk on our cell phones, and miss the breathtaking sunrise. Instead of lingering over a family dinner, we grab something as we run out the door or turn on the news. We kiss our children good night and quickly return to our work forgetting to gaze at their peaceful and ever-changing faces. They grow so fast….

A couple days ago, I was at the drive up window at our bank. A man pulled into the lane next to me and put his transaction in that mysterious tube that I’m afraid to use. I listened as the teller quickly said, “Hi, how are you?” The man replied back, “Okay, how are you?”

Sound familiar?

Imagine if the man said, “Actually, I’m terrible. My toilet sprung a leak, my cat scratched the dog, my wife is PMS’ng, and the store it is out my favorite cereal.” And the teller, accustomed to people routinely saying, Okay, how are you?” responded, “Great!” It’s great that he’s having a bad day? Did she even hear his answer?

I have observed this in Christian circles. A hurting person shares how they are honestly feeling and inevitably someone will say, “Oh honey, don’t worry. You know God promises to work everything out.” It’s almost become a Christian cliché, a pat answer we give without thinking. Maybe it’s a way to simply end the conversation. If I were the person who took the risk of sharing, I wouldn’t feel very good after that response. I might feel badly that the person didn’t think I trusted God enough. I might feel wounded that the person brushed me off. I might feel angry that the person minimized my pain.

Don’t misunderstand me, Romans 8:28 is a beautiful promise and should be used to encourage another believer. But it’s a promise with substance and shouldn’t be cheapen by using it glibly. There are two things that are really important to know about that verse before you use it. First, it is promised only to Christ followers.  Second, it does not guarantee that circumstances will get better here on earth. It is promised with an eternal perspective in mind. God has a much bigger view of our lives than we do. He knows that 99.99999% of our lives are going to be spent in Eternity. So He is much more concerned with growing us up in Christ than making our lives cushy. And that is for our own good.

So next time you ask someone how they are doing, make sure you are authentically willing to listen. And when they courageously admit that life is difficult, avoid the quick fix answers. Sometimes circumstances don’t change and that’s okay. As a friend, pray that God will give them strength and grace for the next step. Ask God to allow your friend to clearly sense His presence. Thank God for Jesus’ example and that He understands. He sweat drops of blood and yet was determined to do His Father’s will.

Slow down. Listen. Pray. Encourage. Be.

True Friends September 10, 2008

Does your heart long for true friends?  I recently spent three days with Sue and Kellee, two of my lifelong girlfriends.  We have known each other for almost 30 years and plan to grow old together.  We are committed to our relationship.

I am thankful because these friends love me unconditionally.  They have been by my side through ups and downs, laughter and tears, pimples and wrinkles, proud moments and ones I wish I could undo.  Because Sue and Kellee assume the best about me, I am free to be completely myself.  There is no fear of rejection.  What a precious gift!

Our friendship, however, didn’t happen instantaneously.  It developed.  It grew.  For years we have chosen to invest in each other and we continue to make our friendship a priority.

Sometimes I wonder if our current culture encourages us to sacrifice deep relationships for accomplishments.  Everyone is so busy.  But what are we running for?  What are we running after?  When is the last time you sat on a porch, rocking side by side and sharing your heart?  True friendships are not made on the run.  They require time…consistency…patience.

I met Sue and Kellee at the church I grew up in.  Church is a wonderful place to find quality lifelong friends.  Last Sunday I spoke to two women who met at Grace (my church) and are now best friends.  One of them has a year to live.  She is dying of cancer.  Although they are sad and grieve over the idea of being separated for a time, I observed a sparkle as they shared about their plans for Eternity…..hanging at each other’s mansions and jumping in chocolate fountains!  They are going to be forever friends.

How about you?  Are you investing in friendships?  When you’re 80, who will you reminisce with?  Remember real friendships take time…are you ready to make relationships a priority?  I guarantee you won’t regret it!

Spot On September 2, 2008

“I trust you” were the words I silently spoke to God as my doctor performed the biopsy.  I learned first hand how these simple words have a profound impact when they are believed.

I had been anticipating this day since the doctor called saying we had to check for thyroid cancer.  Seven long weeks had passed.  I was emotionally tired as I waited for the procedure to begin.  The battling of the unknown was almost over.  I took several deep breaths…partially to calm my nerves and partially out of relief that answers were near.

All summer the anxious thoughts bombarded my mind.  I was amazed at how relentless they were.  I never expected to be immune to them, but I was shocked at their persistent attacks.  I didn’t know if the thoughts came from my own fear or if Satan was seizing the opportunity.  All I knew was they came and I had to take captive every one (2 Corinthians 10:5).  It was an exhausting process.   Some days my head felt like it was spinning.

Do you remember the old playground merry-go-rounds?  We would run as fast as we could, hop on, and let the merry-go-round spin us until the surroundings lost their distinctiveness and blurred into a line of mixed colors.  Then we would jump off, usually stumbling around until we fell to the ground.

The only way to prevent the dizziness was to “spot.”  Spotting is a technique dancers use to help keep their balance.  You chose a specific mark, or spot, in front of you and you force your eyes to focus on that spot.  When you can’t turn any further without taking your eyes off the spot, you quickly snap your head around and immediately refocus on the spot.  It’s what allows ballerinas to come out of a quadruple pirouette into a perfectly balanced pose.  It works, but it takes a lot of discipline.

During this time of waiting, I had many opportunities to practice my spiritual spotting technique.   Every time a fear-producing thought entered my mind and I was tempted to look away, I tried to keep my eyes focused on God, my spot.  It did take a lot of discipline to think about what is true (Phil. 4:8) and not allow my mind to spin with negative thoughts.  As I focused on God, I reminded myself that He is in control, He is trustworthy, and He knows what is best.  It wasn’t easy, but it worked.

I must confess, however, I remember becoming frustrated at one point and wondering why the anxious thoughts would not go away.  I was taking them captive by replacing them with Truth, but they would not permanently retreat!  That’s when I realized that victory is not found in the elimination of the thoughts, but rather the continuous conquering of them.  As long as we live on this side of Eternity, the battle will continue and we must fight.

If you are feeling like life is spinning out of control, try giving spiritual spotting a try.  Stand firm.  Stay strong.  Fix your eyes on Jesus and you will experience steadiness and balance in the midst of your struggles.

When I am afraid, I will trust in You.

In God, whose words I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid.

What can mortal man do to me?

Psalm 56:3

(My report came back and I don’t have cancer.  We are thankful!)

Going For Gold August 20, 2008

The Olympics are a great reminder that self discipline produces amazing results. This week as I watched the chiseled runners glide around the track, I remembered a time when I too pursued a dream of being a great runner.

We lived on Duane Lake and the natural beauty extended a daily invitation to come out and enjoy. One gorgeous April day, I decided to become a runner. I imagined myself gliding with ease, feet barely touching the ground, and the wind whipping through my hair. I anticipated the exhilaration of a runner’s high. My goal was to run around the lake without stopping by the end of summer. Now before you become too impressed, you need to understand that we are talking about a whooping 2 ½ mile run!

I laced my sneakers, stretched out, took a few deep breaths, and I started running. Well, actually I started jogging! I went past the first mailbox and felt great. I went past the second mailbox and felt good. By the third mailbox I was done! My feet felt like cement and the only thing running through my hair was sweat. I walked the rest of the lake wondering if the runner’s high was a myth.

The next day I tried again. Only this time I was a little more realistic. My goal for the day was the fourth mailbox! As I walked the remainder of the lake, I realized that at my current pace I would never meet my goal by the end of summer. So I established a schedule to follow.

One day in June, Rex decided he would go running with me. By this time, I was about half way through my schedule and felt proud of my accomplishment. I was eager for Rex to see my progress. We started out. It was a beautiful picture; husband and wife running side by side around the lake. That was until I hit my mark for that week and Rex continued to run….with ease! At that point I did what every competitive woman would do, I declared that I felt great and that today was the day I would conquer the lake!

My “can-do” attitude lasted for the next quarter of a mile and then my adrenaline wore off and I became a mess. But Rex ran at my heels reminding me of my goal and convincing me to stick with it. He continued to encourage me even when I accused him of trying to kill me!

I clearly remember the agony I felt as we approached the final hill. Every ounce of my body was screaming! My legs were cramping and my chest felt like it was going to burst! I had a decision to make. Was I going to press on or was I going to quit? Everything in me wanted to stop and if I was running on my own, I would have.

Everyone faces challenges in life. We all do our best. We give it our all. But what happens when you become discouraged? When you are so tired you can’t remember the goal? Do you have someone who runs at your heels encouraging you to not quit? The Christian life is not meant to be lived alone. It’s too difficult. I admit that allowing others to run by your side is risky. They’ll see your weaknesses. It is very humbling, but it’s wonderfully freeing. You learn that you are loved for who you are, not just because you are competent.  When you are strong, you will have the joy of being an encourager.  And when you are weak, you will receive the support you need.  Is it time for you to take a risk and invite someone on your run? Or even better, maybe it’s time to join a team!

By the way, thanks to Rex I made it all the way around the lake that day. I was so happy and SO HOT that I celebrated by jumping in the lake….snapping turtles and all!

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.

Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing,

but let us encourage one another – and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

Hebrews 10:24-25